Top Gear

So have you sent your CV to the BBC yet? The best job in the country is up for grabs and carpe diem is the appropriate motto for such occasions, so if you haven't already done so, do it now and good luck. However, competition should be fierce and I reckon I've spotted the ideal candidate: Brian Sewell, yep that's right, the art critic. Sewell's a national treasure, even more inclined to let the truth off the lead to chase off hypocrisy and correctness with his candour than Clarkson, he's drawn more than the occasional bought of censorial attention. On one notable occasion, a cadre of the benighted had cause to draft an open letter accusing him of homophobia, er yeah, nice one you miops, what do you do for an encore, tie your own shoelaces? Anyway gotta rush, gotta catch the post with this CV.

Culture shock

I quite like pancakes, because flour is cheap and it makes eggs go a long way, so during the summer I will often knock some pancakes together, from whatever is available. The batter benefits from some fortification, the easiest way to accomplish this, is to make it with milk, if that's not to hand some other fat: butter, dripping, lard or at pinch, vegetable oil will do. It's easier with milk because there's no trouble with lumps, which saves some effort, you can make 'em without any fat, they'll just be a little rubbery that's all. In my naivety I thought My ad hoc approach to the preparation and consumption of these morsels was consistent with the broader approach but I've since found that, for those for who pancakes are more occasional fare, it's more common for precise recipes to be employed. Which is fair enough I suppose, if you're just eating 'em, once yearly on Shrove Tuesday. However I later encountered a conception of pancake preparation that I found far harder to reconcile. Speaking to a friend on the phone, the subject of pancakes came up, perhaps because I prepared some earlier that day. This friend was from the US, so keen to learn the differences between pancakes here and there, I asked for  details of how she prepared them. I was surprised to be told that something called Pancake Mix was available through normal retail outlets and the method employing that ingredient was the most ubiquitous technique. So I expressed my admiration at the advent of such a labour saving commodity, after all think of the convenience, no need to buy eggs or milk. It was at this juncture that the aspect of the commonly employed method of pancake preparation in the US became something of a mystery, because I was more than a little startled to be informed, that you still needed to include eggs, milk or fat additionally, to this so convenient Pancake Mix that you bought in the shop. "So this Pancake Mix, it's just flour then?" I asked, rather tentatively. There was something of pause in the conversation here and maybe the faint tinkle of one or two pennies hitting the floor.

"I don't know," was the answer that came back, I'm still not sure what exactly is in Pancake Mix, perhaps some powdered glucose, included to boost the calories is the justification for the existence of this comestible, who knows?

I'll never forget Whats'isname (Michael Ripper)

Michael Ripper is an interesting case, he was as ubiquitous as Kensington Gore in Hammer productions and did quite a bit of TV work too. His roles were generally brief, sometimes not much more than bit parts but his range as a character was quite wide, taking on the roles of grumbling inn keepers, merchant sailors aboard distressed vessels, kindly geezers and belligerent heavies in his stride. He did get a quite a meaty role in Freewheelers, a children's TV drama series from the sixties and seventies. Freewheelers aired during the early evening slot, where children's TV tended to predominate, before the early evening news bulletin. I recall it being a little naff, something of the Saturday morning serial about its production standards but it did make efforts to keep the action rolling, speedboats and other marine vessels being quite prominant, probably because the production was based in Southampton.